Every wargamer has lived it. That fateful roll of the dice where probability takes a holiday and betrayal becomes inevitable. Whether you’re storming the beaches, charging with cavalry, or just trying to pass the simplest morale check in the world, those plastic cubes have a way of laughing at us when it matters most.
In my latest video, I tackle the age-old truth: our dice hate us. This isn’t just superstition. It’s a lived experience, backed by decades of disasters. I’ll share some of the classic coping strategies gamers have used to deal with cursed dice — from fiery executions and hammer-smash justice, to melting them in ovens (toxic fumes optional) and my personal favourite: the ritual sacrifice. Because nothing says “behave” like destroying a bad die in full view of its brethren.
But the real meat of the video is in the stories. My own dice disasters are legendary in our group, the Posties Rejects. I relive the infamous Battle of Hal, a catastrophe so bad it still makes my fellow gamers wince. I recall the time I accidentally ended my wife’s RPG career with one bad roll in Call of Cthulhu. And I share how my children discovered — the hard way — that the dice curse is hereditary.
For miniature painters, tabletop generals, and anyone who loves the hobby, this video is part confessional, part comedy, and part therapy session. Because in the end, wargaming isn’t just about winning or losing. It’s about the stories we tell afterwards. And let’s be honest: the best stories are always the ones where the dice utterly betrayed us.
So grab your dice bag, take a deep breath, and join me as we laugh (and cry) at the cruel, hilarious fate that unites every wargamer: rolling ones when it matters most.
