Wednesday 11 September 2013

Below Average

My dice rolling is bad, really really bad. And by that I mean 'defying the laws of physics' bad. In fact the situation has become so dire that the Rejects own Ray has taken to referring to me as "Poor Lee" rather than Big Lee (the git). I'm a normally rational bloke - I don't belive in 'luck' or 'fate' -  but my dice rolling performance is begining to make me wonder if I am cursed. I have another game this Saturday and I fully expect the dice to be just as goddamned awful as they have been in the last few games. So (more with a morbid sense of curiosity than hope) I decided to test my dice throwing mojo.

My methodology is simple. I will roll three different dice ten times each by hand and then repeating the same test using an electronic dice roller. Hardly scientific but it'll do for the puposes of this test.

So the first batch of real dice, rolled from my own cursed hands:
  • 10d20.... 2,4,7,2,8,15,1,5,4,3 - Average 5.1 
  • 10d10.... 1,1,4,2,5,9,3,1,5,2 - Average 3.3 
  • 10d6....   6,1,2,4,3,1,2,1,2,4 - Average 2.6
Dismal, by anyones standards. Now the same again this time a digital dice rolling programme, so no physical contact with any dice:
  • 10d20....  4,17,19,11,19,4,18,4,8,18 - Average 13.2 
  • 10d10....  8,2,9,9,2,9,10,7,6,8 - Average 7.0
  • 10d6....    6,5,4,6,6,2,1,6,4,4 - Average 4.4
Right. I think that confirms I am cursed! I may have to take drastic measures to rectify this, such as wearing gloves or using tongs to handle the dice so my hands don't come into contact and thereby infect them! I could get someone else to throw the dice for me but them I might as well not take part. Another option would be to shake the dice in a clear plastic box with a lid so I can 'roll' without touching them. My personal favourite option however is a bit more extreme but a lot more satisfying. Threatening dire consequences if the dice misbehave. Such as....

Purged by fire!    (source)
Shot at dawn    (source)
Setting them adrift    (source)
Diecicles!    (source)
Pulverised for bad behaviour     (source)
Made to watch while their buddy is executed    (source)
Ground underfoot    (source)
Driller Killer    (source)

You know your dice are bad when you start having psychotic fantasies about destroying them! 


  1. Oh dear, your not playing on my side anymore!!!! Infact I think you may have to be banned from the shed, encase your infectious!!!

  2. Are you using Chessex dice? Grab a brick of Koplow and I think you'll be surprised by the improvement.

  3. Play a game where low rolls are good :)

  4. You did many moons ago say you were trying to create some gladiator rules (oh yes you did) so either use cards instead of dice or create a game where low is good and 1's are a critical! You'll walk it then.

    On a side Note at least you have gotten Waldof and Stadler (Fran and Ray) to agree on something! Even if it is quarantine!

  5. I have always preferred throwing "bad" dice across the room toward the trash can. Hasn't happened often, but more than once.

  6. Actually I think the next game you should test the theory by having low values be beneficial. If you truly are cursed you will roll high the whole game.

  7. Try using the die roller from the old boardgame "Trouble", that way you don't actually have to touch the die.

    And as a plus, it'll be quite entertaining for your fellow gamers watching you mash that bubble :)

  8. See if you can add the dice roller app to your phone and convince the others to allow you to use it.

  9. With all those low rolls you would be a son of b**ch to break in Impetus!! Of course you would need to hit sometimes, but it seems you roll high occasionally.


  10. My rolls are pretty average, except for 2D6 command rolls. Samulus will attest to my dreadful luck at those.

  11. If your plan is up to snuff and you've properly covered every eventuality, then dice rolls are of minimal importance. However, this has never worked for me so I think it's all b******s! Even Boney believed in luck.


  12. You have my sympathies.... I am in the same boat as you, my dice rolling is generally sub-par, leading to my fellow gamers labelling me the 'special boy', or just 'special'...

  13. See my post "Vices of my Father"

    Shall I bring it to Blog-Con so you can execute some dice as examples?


  14. I'd go for the opposite approach... Soak 'em in holy water overnight prior to the game and yell " I FEEL THE POWER!!!" every time you throw them. Even if you still don't roll high at least your opponents will be suitably disconcerted.

    Is the game on Saturday a Rejects game ? If so, what period?

    1. If the dice don't perform I'll be soaking them in kerosene and burning them!

      Yes its a rejects game but when I spoke to Postie the other day he hadn't decided what period or rules we were playing.

    2. LOL looking forward to the report. Good luck.

  15. I feel your pain, Lee. My hapless wizard went through a cold streak on his HD rolls from 2nd to 8th level - all ones. Every level I though "next time I'll roll a 4." Heh.

    I wrote about it on the old blog:

    I'm happy to report I broke that streak at 9th with a 4 (finally!)


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